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21 August 2009 @ 12:47 am
Ladies and Gentleman of the class of '97... wear sunscreen.

If I could offer you only one tip for the future, sunscreen would be it.

The long term benefits of sunscreen have been proved by scientists whereas the rest of my advice has no basis more reliable than my own meandering experience.

I will dispense this advice now.

Enjoy the power of your youth. Never mind. You will not understand the power and beauty of your youth until they have faded. But trust me, in 20 years you'll look back at photos of yourself and recall in a way you can't grasp now how much possibility lay before you and how fabulous you really looked.

You are not as fat as you imagine.

Don't worry about the future; or worry, but know that worrying is as effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing bubblegum. The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that never crossed your worried mind; the kind that blindside you at 4pm some idle Tuesday.

Do one thing everyday that scares you.


Don't be reckless with other people's hearts, don't put up with people who are reckless with yours.


Don't waste your time on jealousy; sometimes you're ahead, sometimes you're behind. The race is long, and in the end, it's only with yourself.

Remember compliments you receive, forget the insults; if you succeed in doing this, tell me how.

Keep your old love letters, throw away your old bank statements.


Don't feel guilty if you don't know what to do with your life. The most interesting people I know didn't know at 22 what they wanted to do with their lives, some of the most interesting 40 year olds I know still don't.

Get plenty of calcium.

Be kind to your knees, you'll miss them when they're gone.

Maybe you'll marry, maybe you won't, maybe you'll have children, maybe you won't, maybe you'll divorce at 40, maybe you'll dance the funky chicken at your 75th wedding anniversary. Whatever you do, don't congratulate yourself too much or berate yourself, either. Your choices are half chance, so are everybody else's. ENjoy your body, use it every way you can. Don't be afraid of it, or what other people think of it, it's the greatest instrument you'll ever own.

Dance. Even if you have nowhere to do it but your own living room.

Read the directions, even if you don't follow them.

Do NOT read beauty magazines, they will only make you feel ugly.

Get to know your parents, you'll never know when they'll be gone for good.

Be nice to your siblings; they are your best link to your past and the people most likely to stick with your in your future.

Understand that friends come and go, but for the precious few you should hold on. Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography in lifestyle because the older you get, the more you need the people you knew when you were young.

Live in New York City once, but leave before it makes you hard; live in Northern California once, but leave before it makes you soft.


Accept certain inalienable truths, prices will rise, politicians will philander, you too will get old, and when you do you'll fantasize that when you were young prices were reasonable, politicians were noble, and children respected their elders.

Respect your elders.

Don't expect anyone else to support you. Maybe you have a trust fund, maybe you'll have a wealthy spouse; but you never know when either one might run out.

Don't mess too much with your hair, or by the time you're 40, it will look 85.

Be careful whose advice you buy, but, be patient with those who supply it. Advice is a form of nostalgia, dispensing it is a way of fishing the past from the disposal, wiping it off, painting over the ugly parts, and recycling it for more than it's worth.

But trust me on the sunscreen.
23 July 2009 @ 12:59 am
My little Sophia's brother and sisters need homes!!

They're living in a smashed up, torn cardboard box with ripped up shirts in it. It's not even considered a box anymore! The box is outside on the side of this house in the heat. It's incredibly sad. ): They're getting kicked out of the house Saturday and they'll probably just leave the cats out there.

There's a male kitten, two females, and the momma cat that need homes. The pound and stuff is too full to take them, so if you can take one, pleasepleaseplease let me know!!
Looking forward to a low-key 4th of July! Hopefully the weather cooperates and I can see some fireworks. (:

I was talking to my mom today and I think we're going to Canada in two years! Woo hoo! My aunt is going back to their hometown to spread my grandma's ashes, so my mom and I decided to go with her. Other than that fact, I am very excited.

Things with my mom have been.. rocky. She gets offended at things I say SO easily, it's ridiculous. I say something sarcastic and she flips the fuck out. It's probably the thing that annoys me the most in the world. The other day, she was watching videos of babies laughing and animals falling asleep.. (kill me now) and somebody edited a video of a baby laughing so it would sound really creepy and she asked me HOW TO FIX IT. I was like "Seriously?! You have to find the video that isn't edited" and she explodes at me and is like "THAT DOESN'T MEAN ANYTHING TO ME!!!" Um.. okay then. Just now, she asked me how to spell "generous" but I told her to figure it out because she's been a bitch to me all day long and she just started screaming. Who knows what she said!

Going to Payson next weekend for a family reunion. It's going to be pretty big, I think, but it'll probably be the last time I'll see a lot of these people. Corey is coming, so it won't be too unbearable. We're gonna take him all around Payson and show him where my dad lived and stuff, I think. It should be kinda fun!

I've decided to go to school in the fall if I can get a car and everything works out just as I plan it to. I've thought about taking a semester off, but I don't really want to graduate in the middle of a school year. I have no idea what classes I'm going to be taking or if it's too late. We'll see!
I haven't really talked about graduation, so here we go! It looked like it was going to rain all day, and we were finding out at 4 whether or not we were graduating as a class outside on the field, or split in half in the gym and auditorium. I was a complete wreck. I've looked forward to graduation since I was a little kid; how little girls dream of their weddings, I dreamed about graduating. Okay, maybe not that much, but still! (: Anyways, the call came at 4 that we were graduating outside! We get there at 7 and it starts to rain, go figure. So we're all standing out there until 7:30 until it can start all soaking wet. Our caps got all warped and were drooping. They cut it shorter than they would have if there was good weather, which was fine with me. Blah blah blah, my name was called & I got my diploma. I really don't feel any different; any wiser or matured in any way at all. I haven't really talked to anyone either.. partly because majority of my friends graduated last year. I have talked to the people I will keep in touch with, but nobody really outside of that. I'm sad to be moving on but it hasn't hit me yet. I NEVER EVEN CRIED! That's a big shocker for me! I feel like a kid that's on summer vacation from school, we'll see how I feel in two months.

I'm really wanting to buckle down and save for a car.. after I buy some new summer clothes! We'll see how that goes. I'm not spending any of my grad money, it's all going into my savings for my car.

Corey and I have pretty much decided that we'll live together once we're both financially stable enough. We want a yellow lab puppy eventually, Corey wants to name him Dollar (like Richie Rich's dog), but I'm still trying to get used to it. I'm really excited to start my own life outside of this house and aside from my parents.

Our 2 year anniversary is in about two weeks! It's weird to think that people get engaged and married around the 2 year mark. I've become so comfortable in this relationship that it scares me sometimes, but at the same time it's the biggest security I have in my life. I can always run to him for help or comfort or anything else that I need and it's an amazing feeling that I have a constant there to lean on when I need him. Our relationship isn't perfect, but I'm happy.
27 November 2008 @ 12:18 pm
Happy Thanksgiving, bitches!
12 November 2008 @ 07:14 am
HERO camp! Be home on Friday (:
04 November 2008 @ 10:30 pm




22 September 2008 @ 11:10 pm
quentin fields was a basketball player. he was also a son.
a brother. somebody's teammate. somebody's friend. i never
knew quentin fields and i guess now i never will. did you
ever wonder what it would be like if you weren’t you anymore?
If you were suddenly gone how would your world react? whatever
you imagined was wrong. there’s nothing romantic about death.
grief is like the ocean: it’s deep and dark and bigger than
all of us. and pain is like a thief in the night. quiet. persistent.
unfair. diminished by time and faith and love. i didn’t know
quentin fields but i'm jealous of him because i see how his
absence has affected the people that did know him so i know
that he did matter to them. and i know he was loved. people
say quentin fields was a great basketball player. graceful.
fluid. inspiring. they say on a good night it almost seemed
as though he could fly. and now he can
17 September 2008 @ 09:19 pm

I bought my first cigarettes and porn tonight as a brand new 18 year old!
17 July 2008 @ 11:06 pm

The Quiet World
by Jeffrey McDaniel

In an effort to get people to look
into each other's eyes more,
the government has decided to allot
each person exactly one hundred
and sixty-seven words
, per day.

When the phone rings, I put it
to my ear without saying hello.
In the restaurant I point
at chicken noodle soup. I am
adjusting well to the new way.

Late at night, I call my long
distance lover and proudly say
I only used fifty-nine today.
I saved the rest for you.

When she doesn't respond, I know
she's used up all her words
so I slowly whisper I love you,
thirty-two and a third times
After that, we just sit on the line
and listen to each other breathe.